I had an MRI on my knee Monday. Did you know that MRI machines are really noisy? I had no idea. From the movies, it looks like a semi-relaxing experience to lie in an MRI machine (unless you are claustrophobic, then it probably wouldn't be relaxing at all---unless you took your sedation medicine). But, yeah, MRI machines are loud and obnoxious. I don't ever want to have another MRI in my life. Especially one where they have to put my entire body into the machine. Thankfully I was free from my waist up...only waist down went into the magnetic machine.
For a minute I thought I was going to break the machine because I forgot to take my bobby pin out of my hair. But, thankfully it didn't pull. Another thing that I was thankful didn't pull was the piece of metal my former dentist left in my mouth. Wouldn't that be a weird sensation.
Anyway, my doctor called me with the results on Tuesday, and it's not good news. He informed me that I have an ACL tear and a meniscus tear. He says it looks like the ACL has been torn for a while (he's right...probably since 2005), but is more concerned about the meniscus tear because of cartilage wearing on the bone, or something.
He recommends surgery as soon as possible, and even though I can't imagine getting surgery with three small children at home, I have a date set to have knee surgery on Dec. 13. Less than three weeks away, and in between holidays.
I know I said I would postpone this surgery if I had an ACL tear, but after talking over the options with my husband, we figured that it probably is now or never, and we can't put it off because my meniscus might tear at a whim again. I wanted to wait until Grayson is older, but then I'd have two little children to keep track of. Might as well do it now while he is not mobile.
My mom said she would come and help me, and my husband is planning on taking some days off of work, but I am still scared. I have a hard time depending on other people, and I feel like I am letting my family down because I can't take care of them like I should.
Not to mention that I have this new calling to consider and I feel like I won't be able to fulfill my responsibilities of it until some time in February. That said, the president keeps insisting that I can take my time and not to worry about it, but I have a feeling she might start getting disappointed in the meantime. Let's just hope she really is sincere....which I am sure she is. I am just paranoid about it because when I had Kalli, I was in the Young Women's Presidency and the president kept saying I could take my time, but in the end she was really disappointed I didn't get back to normal sooner. She was relying on me pretty heavily, and it was frustrating for both of us.
Okay, I'm done venting. It's nice to get that off my chest. I know that I will be blessed and that even though things might seem overwhelming right now, it will all work out in the end. That's what I can hope and pray for.
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