#2 What has been the biggest trial in your life so far? How did you overcome it and what did you learn?

Undoubtedly, the biggest trial I have endured in this life is the death of my father. I wouldn't necessarily say that I have over come the trial, but I have definitely learned a lot from it.

When my dad died, in December of 2007, suddenly from aspiration and a heart attack (although was also dying slowly from metastatic prostate cancer), I was devastated. I knew that his death was imminent, though, because I had fasted for the first time in a couple of years (because of being pregnant, then breastfeeding) the Sunday before he passed away (which was on a Tuesday). I had a personal fast to have the comfort I needed in knowing that my dad was dying and that his time with us on earth was short. I needed all the help I could get to muster up the courage to see him in his last days. I didn't realize that his death was going to be in two days, but I wasn't as surprised as my brothers about his sudden death, because the spirit of the Holy Ghost touched my heart and brought me the comfort that I was seeking.

After his death, I was angry. I wanted to rebel in some sort of way. The way I rebelled is silly (looking back), but it was the best I could do. I decided that I wasn't going to follow the counsel of the prophets and I was going to watch whatever shows piqued my interest. I didn't care if the movie had an R rating, or if it would make me feel yucky watching it, because I was angry and it didn't matter to me.

I remember watching this sniper show that was super violent. I would have never chosen a movie like that to watch prior to this time, but I rented it, and I watched it, and I secretly liked most of the show. But, what I didn't like was the violence it subjected me to, and the fact that I can still, to this day, see some of the violent scenes in my head if I stop to think about them.

What did this rebellion serve? Nothing. Thankfully, it didn't last long and my Savior helped to heal my wounded heart. I mourned my father as I needed to, and I moved on in a more righteous path. I learned that Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ are very mindful of us. Even when we are lost and wounded. I am forever grateful that I didn't continue down a dark path that would have lead me farther from the truth of the Gospel and righteous living. I am grateful that my anger left as quickly as it did and no further damage was done to my spirit, or to the spirit of our home.

Now, when I think of my father, I think of him as a healthy man, and remember all of the great memories we had together. I am even happy to say that he visits me in my dreams every once and a while, and for that I am grateful.